This is a mirror of sasquatch2008.com. The domain expired and since it's 2009, and we have a new president, Sasquatch decided it was time to concede defeat.

Sasquatch for President 2008 - Real Change

One huge thumbs up, for America! Are you tired of empty campaign promises and false hopes? Are you tired of seeing your government trample all over your freedoms and squander the nation's resources while you foot the bill? If you answered yes to either of these questions, then Sasquatch is the right Gigantopithecus for you.

Sasquatch will stomp out high taxes, defeet the terrorists, and give the health care system a big kick in the pants. With his outstanding environmentalist experience, Sasquatch's first priority is to enact what he calls "Global Reforestation" (starting with Detroit). As a strict Cryptozoological Isolationist party member, Sasquatch understands the value of privacy and will fight to give you back your surrendered freedoms with his "Privacy Rights and Standards Act."

Some of Sasquatch's campaign highlights include:

  • Free Health Care for your pets
  • Campaign finance reform
  • Education system overhaul
  • Decriminalization of all currently illegal natural plants
  • Stricter hunting rules
  • Ending wars by adhering to strict isolationist policies
  • National plaster foot cast identification system to stop illegal immigration

Some interesting facts and reasons to vote for Sasquatch:

  • He's huge, he's awesome, and he definitely exists.
  • If you think he's fake, just take a look at that plaster cast of his foot. WHOA!
  • He's not a troll, a wendigo, a yeti, or a bear with a severe case of mange.
  • Picture of plaster bigfoot cast. Is your foot this big? His awesome nickname is "Bigfoot." How cool is that?
  • Born and raised in the woodlands of California but he's been spotted all over.
  • He's the only presidential candidate who has tamed a loch ness monster.
  • He had his custom size 38 loafers specially made out of soy.
  • His campaign headquarters aren't constantly on fire.
  • He assures you that he absolutely does not, and never has eaten a baby. Anything you've heard to the contrary is a smear.
  • He's a very talented rock drummer.
  • It's proven that he has never stolen an entire field trip's lunch.

So this time, do yourself and your neighbors a favor, vote for the eight foot tall bipedal hominoid with a heart of gold. Sasquatch; for you, for US.

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